Saturday, May 26, 2012

Quiet Reflections

   As I sit on the campus Indiana University of Pennsylvania (IUP), my heart becomes overwhelmed with joy and gratefulness mostly because my first college experience was on this campus. I have so many fond memories. It was in this place that I became serious about salvation and MY walk God. It was at IUP that I met my best friend Melanie. I experienced love and heartbreak, joy and sorrow all in the short year that I was on campus.

   One thing that stands out most to me as I sit in this coffee shop is the morning that I met with the Dean of the chemistry department here on campus. I had asked for the meeting because I was struggling terribly academically and I was already on academic probation. This was during one of the darkest times in my life when I was depressed and deeply mourning the lost of my mother. Waking up everyday was chore and studying and homework took a backseat to miserable days and tear filled nights. While I cannot remember this woman's name, I do remember her telling me that I was not "college material" and that I "did not have what it took to complete this program, let alone become a doctor"

  I remember how my heart broke as she rattled off such heartless words. She didn't know me. She didn't know the story or reason for my struggle. I could feel the tears beginning to fill my eyes. Though her words were as a dagger in my heart I refused to let her see me cry. I let her finish and I walked out of her office broken, defeated, and disappointed.

   I am writing this blog as I anxiously await to cross my second college stage and tears again fill my eyes. Not because of disappointment or sorrow, but because I am about to accomplish in two weeks what I was told this I would never do! And for the record DOCTOR is still the goal and I WILL NOT quit until I reach it!!!!!!